It’s Important to Have a Cause
Puerto Rican thug #1: Man, you gotta wash yo’ hands before you touch yo’ dick, man. You don’t know what’s on ’em. Don King said that.Puerto Rican thug #2: True that. Yo… Don King said that?Puerto Rican...
View ArticleAll Driving Skills Improve (Try It!)
Girl: He gets it up, but he can’t keep it up. He doesn’t understand he’s dating a Puerto Rican, he needs to keep it hard. Guy: He’s Irish. You have to understand he has to drink. Girl: Actually when he...
View ArticleFecal Coliform Wednesday One-Liners
Boricua: Yo, son, I told you! Birdseed don’t know shit about shit! –Fordham University Announcer: The 10:30… Shit, the 11:30 six train to Ronkonkoma is now boarding on track eighteen. Shit… –LIRR...
View ArticleDon't Wrestle Without a Condom, Kids
Black guy: Yo, I can't believe I turn 30 tomorrow.Puerto Rican friend: Yeah, son.Black guy: Like, I've got a family and a career! What the fuck is that all about?! What happened to my wrestling...
View ArticleIsn't That a Medical Condition?
Boricua chick #1: So does your new boyfriend go to school?Boricua chick #2: Yeah, he goes to some fancy-ass school in Manhattan… BMCC or somethin' like that. –Queens Blvd
View ArticleWednesday One-Liners Ain't Got the Money, Honey
Older man, to no one in particular: That's why I keep my income low, so no one jumps me. –Myrtle & Clinton, Brooklyn Woman with scratch-off lotto card to friend: I won four dollars! I won four...
View ArticleYou Should Hear What Puerto Ricans Say About Pride
Queer #1: When is the Puerto Rican Day parade? Queer #2: Omigod, today! Queer #1: Hmm. Don’t people get gang-raped at those things? Queer #2: Maybe, I guess? Let’s go! –West Side Highway &. Source
View ArticleStacy London: Ooooo…
Obese 40-something Puerto Rican hoochie in black tube top: Hey, watch where you’re going. Little blonde teen: Sorry. Didn’t realize you were late for your episode of “what not to wear.” –Bleecker &...
View ArticleThe Hills Are Alive with the Sound Of Wednesday One-Liners
Puerto Rican Mets fan in day parade, singing: “Aye girl, lemme smell yo feet, aye girl lemme smell yo feet, oooh oooh oooh, lemme smell yo feet.” –Union Square Egg-shaped man with cane, singing to the...
View ArticleBecause Technically, White Is Just the Absence of Race
Puerto Rican girl: Wwhy you all cut that island in half? You racist against the niggas on the other half? They your neighbors! Dominican girl: I know, right? It’s the hatred. Like, you all be racist...
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